The first step , taking 100% responsibility for whatever is/has been with us ,
whatever situation (conflict/dis-ease/accident/loss ) is/has been with us, takes
the acknowledgment that we are indeed co-creators and that life is much more
vast than the 3- dimensional reality many of us still move in.
100% responsibility means to observe the situation from a place of the greater view ,
the greater Self, if you will , what in Hawaaian Huna medicine is called the "Aumakua",
the place of Spirit , that holds
no judgment about whatever we have created .
( Many people still hold the place of Spirit as a place of the old man who waves
his finger at us , expecting a judgment , experiencing things ' down here'
as a punishment for our ... well, whatever , sins , ignorance, even enjoyment
sometimes . Strike that )
Be clear about this : the Universe holds no judgments.
Whatever we have created that we do not like we create to embrace it into
the light of our awareness.
We create it so the fear can be transmuted.
We have been here many times and all the things we create are collective issues .
So, to start with , you may want to write down these questions :
Why did i create this ? What do i want to learn , what HAVE i learned from it so far ?
Take time to inquire into these questions ; the answer to what we have learned
and what we can learn now can be very different ...
allowing the answers to flow
from your Greater Self .
Then, FEEL THE FEELING that the situation brings forth.
Embrace the feeling that arises , like you would a child .
Though there are only 2 feelings - love and fear -
we may have to work our way through other feelings first, all
rooted in fear : anger , resentment, bitterness, sorrow etc .
Allow it to move through, realizing that one feeling will lead
to the underlying one . It is not necessary to really pound a pillow
( though it may help at times :))
one can just observe a feeling on a felt-sense level ...
allow it to move through .
you may cry, you may shake your body , you may feel the need to
do all sorts of things , but underlying that is the observation from a place of
the compassionate witness ...
Whatever is still in fear in us , whatever is judged/
not in harmony, we will
create as a 'problem' in our life ...
or see in the mirror that we perceive to be the problem .
When you feel the feeling, it may lead you to other, earlier situations .
It may remind you of the first time/s you felt this way .
Allow that to be there. you can track it to it's beginning in that way .
You may ask yourself again , after the feeling has moved through ;
Why did i choose to be born into this situation/theme ... ?
Remember that on a certain level, there is no judgment about any experiences we have.
There usually is more information around that for us .
After feeling the feeling and allowing it to move through , you may ask
yourself : what am i afraid of ? what is the judgment behind the fear ?
Whereever there is fear/anger etc., there is also a judgment behind it .
This is often a very old core-belief that we took on as a result of being
in that situation , i.e. ' I am not loveable/ not loved '.
By feeling the fear and holding ourselves from the place of a warm and
interested witness - the place of the Aumakua , if you will -
the judgment can align itself . Something dissolves in the Solar Plexus
and can move up into the heart .
It is also to know that everyone involved in the co-creation has created
it for their own learning , to bless everyone,
ourselves included, and to bless our creation so that we
may learn from it .
Whether anyone else involved learns from it or not is not really our business ...
unless there is something to share and it is safe to do so ,
it is only our job to un-wind and understand our own co-creation .
When we take 100% responsibility, there is only one place to forgive ,
if we feel that way still, and that is ourselves ...
Also , taking responsibility in that way doesn't exclude everyone else
to be equally responsible ... it's just their lesson to learn - or not.
The last question you may want to ask yourself is ;
How else can i hold this (situation)?
Meaning , doing a 180 with it . Stand it on it's head - or yourself,
for that matter . Look at it from a different perspective. Not as a disaster ,
but as a "wondrous" creation that you have brought in to understand the
pearl of wisdom at it's center .
i can guarantee that if you do this at depth , it is very, very trans-formative
and gets us to a new place .
And whether or not you do this is, of course, a choice .
I can say that i have read the material **) for quite a while , but only
since i have really sat myself down and gone through the above steps ,
has there been an 'ah !'
Addendum: understanding happenings in this way - that there is no right or wrong -
does not mean that all the awful things we can do to each other and
ourselves are in harmony . Not at all.
Whoever chooses to oppress, rape, hord obscene amounts of
money etc. is certainly very much in a place of ignorance ,
as the Buddhists' say .
When one knows one's self to be part of the divine ,
when one lives in a place of love rather than fear , one also knows/
acknowledges everything else as part of divinity ...
To me, choosing to acknowledge myself as the co-creator of some
rather awful happenings ( that otherwise i might view as me being the
victim ) just opens a different place to look from and
brings in new and different information about something .
Sometimes, there are scenarios we may not be ready to deal
with in that way ; for instance having been raped or tortured ...
I would suggest starting with something that is
easier to you , ie. looking at why one finds one's self
repeatedly playing a certain role or some such thing .
Or why, when one sets one's boundaries, other people start to act
out even more around the theme. And so on .
One place leads to another .
If you do choose to go into the center of a big trauma like
abuse or rape , allow yourself to go deeper and deeper into the
question of "why did i create this?. What is the learning
i wanted to bring in?" For me as a woman, a lot of my co-creation has/had
to do with becoming aware of my "box" = conditioning and un-doing that.
For instance, for a long time, i felt that i was not 'loving enough' and therefore
allowed my boundaries to be consistently over-stepped. ( Many girls/women
get the message that there is something wrong with them when they
don't accommodate someone who is trying to get their way. )
The deeper we go with that , the more we will
come to the place of the Ouroboros: where the snake eats it's
own tail/tale . When we recognize ourselves as divine beings ,
we also recognize our participation in the great agreement of
what we perceive to be reality . We move into a place that is timeless ,
where contradictions are resolved , where
we can recognize collective themes as teachings and we can
also make a choice of bringing in a different paradigm :
Am i ready to meet life from a different place than perpetuating
suffering/fear ? That really does mean that we take responsibility for
the whole, not just the part we may have mirrored so far ...
For the wisdom traditions, that is the place where we can shake
hands with the other , congratulating each other for the amazing
ride we have given each other ...( provided the 'other' is doing the work,
as well .)
If not , it will go on and it is important to realize that all expression is valid
as part of our choice and divine expression.
As CG Jung said : " whatever is not resolved within will show itself
as a happening without "
And so we can have on-going wars , poverty , environmental distruction
and wonder why we develop cancers ...
*) this material was taken from : the P'Taah tapes, books 1&2 , channeled by Jani King
book 1 : An Act of Faith
book 2 : Transformation of the Species